The Lost Art of Haggling

My Dad was an expert at haggling. Even my uncles who were pretty good at it themselves would ask dad to come along when they shopped for cars, furniture or any big ticket item. Much of his best haggling was directed towards the Jewish furniture store owner who prospered in his Lumberg Furniture Store on Michigan Avenue.

Harry Lumberg was a Polish Jew who immigrated here about the time many of the local Poles did sometime in the early 1900s - before things got too heated back in Poland. He spoke Polish and knew the ways of the people. He was my father’s favorite opponent  in the haggling arena where he and my father first met in 1939 when my parents were outfitting their first apartment.

If he or anyone he knew wanted to buy any furniture, my father would say, “"let’s go see the Jew,” as if Harry was the only person of that persuasion in town. Once he set foot in harry's store, dad would gaze around and look at the prices affixed to the stock. It was unthinkable for my father to buy anything at the prices listed on the tags, even if they were marked down. He would look at that tag then turn to Harry and with a dismissive chuckle say: “So what’s my price Harry”?

That’s how the drills began - a flurry of bids and counters, feints and thrusts masterfully served and returned. The men used all the tricks alternately raising and lowering their voices and tempo. Hand signal, finger pointing, arms thrust in the air in exclamatory gestures, it was always entertaining to  watch these two masters have at it.

Just when you thought that someone had won or was about to concede,  someone would try a new tact and change the direction of the negotiations  360 degrees. New pathways would open up only to be tossed aside. Options would be discussed before reverting back to square one."what's my price Harry"? The discussion would get more heated and contentious as the session went on.

Dad knew all the tricks. But Harry knew a few of his own. One of Dad’s favorites was the “walk out “ play. When he didn’t feel he had squeezed enough out of his opponent, he would make a move towards the door while telling Harry that he couldn’t be serious about making the sale if he insisted on those prices.

Often Harry would stop him before he got too far and another round of negotiation would break out. If that didn’t get the results he wanted, dad would simply shake his head in disgust and leave the store again. That was his classic double walk out move. Harry followed close behind shouting  "wait - wait"

To a first time observer, the antics could be embarrassing, but to these two pros it was business. It was a game they played and Harry expected it. The men respected each other. Dad sent many a customer to Harry over the years.

A few years later, when I got married I tried to use Dad’s tactics when I needed furniture.  I had watched the master apply his methods for years. I had it all down. So the day finally came around for me to face Harry at the haggle court. Harry and I took our positions and began the game.        

I was foolish enough to think I had old Harry backed into a corner. I tasted victory after only 10 minutes or so of amateurish haggling. So I allowed Mr. Lumberg to close the deal and hold on to those few pennies I allowed him to earn. I actually felt sorry for the poor disadvantaged Jewish retailer.

Proud of my victory over Harry, I stopped to see my father and of course Dad asked how I did. “Great dad, I replied”. Are you sure, he asked?  Let’s see! He headed off to see Harry. After a half hour, he returned home and handed me  50 or 100 bucks - complements of Harry Lumberg.   

I will never forget “But what’s my price”?  When the day was over Dad would puff his chest and proudly exclaim, “I got that old Jew good today.” while almost 20 miles away, while sitting at his dinner table, Harry was telling his wife about his great day-beating that old Polack at his game.

That's the way business was done back in the day.

Pole1 

Jew 1  

tie game

Years later I ran into Harry long after he closed his store. The first thing he asked was: "How's your dad? I miss him"